Early in our marriage we talked and prayed about what we wanted for our family during the holidays. There are many traditions we developed over the years, but one activity transformed our Christmas observance. This was a simple daily family worship time focused on reading the story of Jesus’ birth a little at a time in a handmade book designed like an Advent calendar. Ours used Christmas cards for pictures of Mary, Joseph, the angels, etc. (We did find a card with Elizabeth & Mary, but never one of Herod.) For eighteen years, we have been reading this Christmas story almost every night during the month of December, along with lighting Advent candles, singing a carol, and praying. Eventually God led us to sharing of many good ideas which we have gathered and researched and then to publication of The Advent Book in 2000 by Crossway Books, a division of Good News Publishing in Wheaton, Illinois.

Advent Candles Advent candles may be any color. The most traditional choice is three purple and one pink candle. Purple is the color of repentance, an appropriate attitude when preparing for Christ's coming. The pink candle represents joy and typically is lit on the third Sunday. White candles, which we use, are also common. The center Christ candle usually is white regardless of the colors of the other candles. Over the years, Christians have assigned various meanings to the Advent candles. Here are some examples. First Candle: Prophets, Faith, or History Second Candle: Angels, Joy, or New Birth Third Candle: Shepherds, Love, or Jesus' Second Coming Fourth Candle: Wise Men, Hope, or Peace Our family gives each candle two meanings. We call the first candle the Prophets candle, and it represents faith. The prophets had faith that the promised Messiah would come. The second candle is the Angels candle; it signifies joy. The news the angels told brought joy. The Shepherds candle, our third, is associated with love because the shepherds went to worship Jesus, who is love. Hope is the significance of the Wise Men candle, our fourth. The Wise Men from the East remind us that Jesus was sent not only for the Jewish people, but for every nation. This is the basic format we use for family worship during Advent: We acknowledge the meanings we've given to the Advent candle(s) and light the appropriate one(s); we read the pages of The Advent Book, beginning with Day 1 and ending on the current date; we sing a carol, pray, and blow out the candle(s), again acknowledging the meanings we've chosen. We also enjoy extending our worship time as often as possible, reading an additional story or Scripture passage, singing more carols, and finishing up with hot chocolate and cookies. Our family using our Advent candles and homemade Advent book Circa approx. 1989

Advent Wreaths When we first decided to use Advent candles, we shopped around for an Advent candle holder. They were difficult to find and the few we saw were made of glass or metal. We liked the idea of an Advent wreath, both for the symbolism (representing life and growth) and for the way it looked, but did not find any in stores. We solved that problem by learning to make them ourselves. If you are interested in making an Advent wreath of your own, here is the method we use: Spray paint a styrofoam ring (10” diameter by 2” tall ) green, then cover the bottom with green felt. (Optional: Glue Spanish moss on the top and sides as additional cover.) Insert plastic candle holders (made for floral products) and individual evergreen branches into the styrofoam. Weave ivy (tinged with gold spray paint) through the branches and embellish with decorations such as pine cones (which may also be gold painted), holly berries, and small fruits. These may be attached with wired floral sticks. You may also wish to thread ribbon and or thin gold wire though the branches. A simpler version may be made by using a ready made evergreen wreath. Arrange the boughs so that you can place four small candle holders among them and then decorate by winding ribbon through the branches and attaching holly berries. Another method is to use a styrofoam ring without candle holders. (You can just push the candles in, but it is better to cut the holes out first.) Wind a flexible garland of greenery around the ring to cover it and decorate with a few picks that have flowers, berries, ribbons or other decorations attached— These can be purchased at craft stores like Michaels or Hobby Lobby. We light a fifth candle on Christmas Eve. It is placed in a candle holder in the center of the wreath. We like to use a holder which is several inches tall so that the center candle, which represents Christ, stands higher than the rest. We recommend using high quality tall candles if you plan to burn them often. We keep ours burning every evening during the entire family worship time and the first candle is sometimes only about an inch tall by Christmas Eve!

Our Favorite Activities for the Celebration of Christmas Using the Advent candles and Advent Book is our family’s favorite tradition, but there are several others which we have really enjoyed. One is that on Christmas Eve we have a special family dinner with the kids’ grandparents as guests. We always have the same menu— a slow cooked roast, mashed potatoes, rolls, corn, carrots, salad, & sparkling grape juice. After dinner, we enjoy our last Advent time of the year. Dad/Jack, grandma, Shea, grandpa, & Kaidrea Mom/Kathy was the photographer For over fifteen years, we had an annual caroling time with three other families from our church. We caroled at the homes of mutual church members and friends, neighbors, and at least one or two unknowns. The caroling was preceded by pizza dinner and of course it was followed by hot chocolate and cookies. Christmas Day is always spent with Kathy’s family, most of whom live nearby. Over the years, we have established many traditions. One which we feel is particularly meaningful is a Christmas pageant performed by the cousins. It was produced by the moms, Kathy, Mary, and Julie, but as the kids have gotten older, they have taken more responsibility. (There are seven kids, ranging in age from eight to twenty-one.) Each year we choose a retelling of the birth of Jesus from a different point of view, usually inspired by a children’s book, which we then turn into a script. Occasionally we’ve been lucky enough to find an appropriate play and adapted that script to the number and ages of our children. [By the way, we’re always looking for good ideas.] We videotape the plays ahead of time and watch it on Christmas Day, along with at least one or two tapes of past plays. We also have a mini-recital. Our youngest nephew, Kyle, is still part of the audience, but all the other cousins perform. We enjoy the special Christmas music. Every year we also take a photo of all the kids with some silly prop. They have everything from flashing reindeer antlers or Santa’s beards to gift bags and halos. Here are a few of our past photos: Cousins in order of age: Kaidrea, Ryan, Shea, Kara, Devin, Emily, & Kyle

Party! Jack and Kathy have an annual party which always follows the same format. We put luminaria up the front walk to welcome people and have decorations, candles, music, and fragrance to set the mood. The first part of the party is socializing over fondues— cheese and chocolate.When everyone has arrived and had a chance to visit with each other, we play a game. It is a specially prepared Christmas version of games like Taboo, Pictionary, Outburst, Trivial Pursuit, Scattegories, Name That Tune, or Wheel of Fortune. After the game (which is usually very boisterous and rowdy), Jack reads a Christmas story with the illustrations projected on the wall via slides. Then the guests have a chance to stretch out and visit over Christmas cookies & desserts with coffee, tea, or hot chocolate. The next activity is an exchange of small gifts such as candles, coffees, Christmas ornaments, etc. Before the person or couple chooses a gift, each one must answer a question. There are usually three to chose from and we have new ones every year. (A great resource for question ideas is the book, The Christmas Conversation Piece by Bret Nicholaus & Paul Lowrie— We also recommend using these questions for times such as at dinner, during Advent time, or in the car.) The answers are often unpredictable and we are frequently in tears, sometimes of sentiment, but more often laughter. The party traditionally ends with the lighting of our Advent candles and singing of Christmas carols, closing with Silent Night. The last tradition we always do each year involves taking down our Christmas tree. Due to the large number of ornaments we have, it’s a big task and not surprisingly, it lacks the sense of excitement that was present when we put them up. We invite a family over for dinner and warn them up front that the cost of the dinner is the expectation that they will help take down the ornaments and try to help us finish off the last of our Christmas cookies. We do excuse them from the unpleasant task of removing and untangling the lights and disposing of the tree!

Tradition Traditions are an important part of our celebration of Christmas, but there are also times when change is appropriate. We are in for some big changes this year as both of our kids will be away at college for the first time. We look forward to rebuilding some traditions just for the two of us and also for mid-December when the kids will come home for winter break. Our goal is to hold onto what is important and still relevant, and at the same time, look for new ways to enhance our family life. We are constantly looking for new ideas for Christmas activities and traditions to share with others. If you would be willing to tell us about a favorite of yours, please e-mail us at JackandKathy@AdventBook.com. (If you got the idea from a book, please let us know that so we can properly attribute it to the author.) We would love to hear from you and thank you for your interest!                                    Bibliography The followingis a list of books we recommend. Some are stories or devotional readingsand others are resources for information and ideas. Many of the books were published in the 80’s and are out of print, but hopefully all can be found through the internet (second hand sometimes)— and they are worth the effort of searching. Stories (In Alphabetical Order) An Angel’s Story Max Lucado Thomas Nelson 2002 Baboushka Traditional Russian Folk Tale Our version was published with very colorful illustrations in 1982 by Lion Publishing An old favorite Christmas Classics for Children Warren, Van Woerkom, Rutz, Marxhausen, & Moore Concordia Publishing House 1981 Out of print, but worth looking for. Great short stories for young children (4-8) Poor and/or outdated artwork unfortunately Fair’s Fair Leon Garfield Doubleday 1981 Out of print, but worth looking for. Not about the Christmas story per se, but with good values. One of Jack’s favorites! Jesus’ Christmas Party Nicholas Allan Random House 1991 Out of print, but really worth looking for. Short, simple, & humorous-- but respectful-- account of the birth of Jesus One Wintry Night\ Ruth Bell Graham / Richard Jesse Watson Baker Books 1994 The Christmas story from creation to nativity The Best Christmas Pageant Ever Barbara Robinson Harper & Row / Avon Books 1982 “Chapter book” rather than an illustrated story book Humorous & good The Christmas Letters Bret Nicholaus Questmarc Publishing 2000 The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey Susan Wojciechowski / P.J. Lynch Candlewick Press 1999 Very good The Christmas Visitor Anneliese Lussert / Loek Koopmans North South Books 1998 Very good The Gift of the Magi O’Henry Our version was illustrated by Lisbeth Zwerger and published in 1982 by Neugebauer Press The Other Wise Man Henry van Dyke / Retold by Pamela Kennedy / Illustrated by Robert Barrett Ideals Children’s Books 1989 Wonderful touching story with a great message A Family Favorite The Tale of Three Trees A Traditional Folk Tale Our version was published in 1989 by Lion Publishing The Twenty-four Days Before Christmas Madeline L’Engle / Joe DeVelasco Harold Shaw Publishers 1984 The Year of the Perfect Christmas Tree Gloria Houston / Barbara Cooney Dial Books for Young Readers 1988 Out of print, but worth looking for- Good story Takes place in the Appalachian Mountains during WW I Artwork fits the story well Devotional Books (In Alphabetical Order) A Family Advent Celebration Dobson, Swindoll, Boice, & Sproul NavPress 1989 O Come Let us Adore Him Melody Carlson / Tony Meers Crossway Books 2000 One Incredible Moment Max Lucado Thomas Nelson 2001 Preparing for Jesus Walter Wangerin Jr. Zondervan 1999 The Christ of Christmas Calvin Miller Broadman & Holman Publishers 2002 The Mary Miracle Jack Hayford Regal Books 1994 Information & Idea Books (In Alphabetical Order) Celebrating a Christ-Centered Christmas Sharon Jaynes Moody Press 2001 The Christmas Book Alice Slaikeu Lawhead Crossway Books 1985 Out of print, but worth looking for. Was republished in the 90’s with a different title. Best book we’ve found for stimulating thinking about how to plan a meaningful celebration of Christmas-- Good advice, information, & suggestions The Christmas Conversation Piece Bret Nicholaus & Paul Lowrie Ballantine Books 1996 “Creative Questions to Illuminate the Holidays” Mixed Content (Example: Some ideas, some devotional thoughts) (In Alphabetical Order) Christmas Abundance Candy Paul Thomas Nelson 2000 The 25 Days of Christmas Rebecca Hayford Bauer Thomas Nelson 1994